ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
