Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
