I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
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