i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
