Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
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