break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Randomize
