i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Randomize