google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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