he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Randomize
