i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
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