So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
My life is pants optional.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
