Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
