Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
