I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
All I want is dick and wine.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
