In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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