omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize