**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
How naked do you want me to be?
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