Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
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