I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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