did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Randomize
