Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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