i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Randomize