If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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