Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
