Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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