Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
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