i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
