Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
