The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Randomize
