Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize