Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize
