I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize