Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
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