He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
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