some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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