I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
