he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
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