His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
