I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
