fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize