What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Randomize
