I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
last night I used snow as a chaser
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Randomize
