The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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