I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Randomize
