you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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