she was so not down for the gang bang
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
