His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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