I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
