just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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