Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Randomize
