508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
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